Psalm 69

God!  Father in Heaven!  Help me!  I can’t do this, I’m in over my head!  I’m damned if I do and damned if I don’t.  I don’t know how to raise my son to honor You.

I’ve called to You for help so loud and long my voice has given out.

People are starting to stare – “Who’s kid is that?!”

“God, You know every sin I’ve committed.”  I can’t hide anything from You.

Don’t let those we’re trying to tell about You be discouraged by the condition of our son’s heart.  Please don’t let our parenting seem as hypocrisy to anyone.  “Don’t let those out looking for You come to a dead end by following me –  Please dear God in Heaven!”

Because we’re trying to make You King of our family, we look like idiots – “They can’t even control their own kids!”

I love You more than I can say – that is why I’m so frustrated with my son’s disrespectful behavior.  When I poured myself out in patient love, all I got was disrespect.  When I told him of my sorrow, he just disobeyed.  (This is beginning to sound like what You have gone through with me, Jesus.)

So I pray some more.  “God, answer me in love!  Answer with Your sure salvation!”

Rescue me from my swamp of discouragement.  Don’t let me drown in my self pity!  Don’t let me give up now.   Help me to cling to You for dear life and cling to my son, fighting tooth and nail for his soul.

“Answer me, God, because You love me.”  Show this whole family Your mercy and grace.

“I’m hurt and in pain; give me space for healing.”  Give me strength to continue each day.  I’ll shout praises to You, Lord, because You are our salvation.  You have captured my son’s heart and I know You will not let him go.  You are shaping him into a vessel You can use and putting me through the fire at the same time.

May our lives be a sweet sacrifice to You, loving God in Heaven.  This is all we ask.

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