Psalm 131

Oh, if only I could sing the words of the Psalmist when he sang, “God, I’m not trying to rule the roost…I haven’t meddled where I have no business or fantasized grandiose plans… I’ve cultivated a quiet heart.  Like a baby content in its mother’s arms, my soul is a baby content.” But I can’t.  Because the truth is, I have tried to rule the roost and I fantasize grandiose plans that have nothing to do with your Kingdom and everything to do with my happiness all the time.  I’ve struggled with discontentment all year long, and quietness of heart is not exactly something I’ve demonstrated a green thumb in cultivating.   I have wrestled with You, strong and gracious God, on the issue of submission for far too long.  And now You’ve won.  You have broken me in the best way possible.  You have changed my heart and my mind.  I am finally able to nestle into my role as submissive wife and daughter of the King. But is it true submission if I am not content with where You have me?!  I cannot do this on my own, knowing Father!  You must cultivate a quiet heart within me!  You must hold me tight like a father holding a child in the throes of a tantrum.  Sing Your peace over me.  Soothe my soul.  In the garden of my heart, plant gratefulness and contentment next to joy and peace.  If You are the gardener, I know I will bear these fruits.  But I cannot do this on my own.  I will submit and follow where You have pointed, but I am trusting You to provide the character and stamina I will need to succeed because I know I cannot do this without being changed by You.

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